not so happy first doctors appointment...

So you might notice I took the baby timer off my blog! Yesterday was my first doctors appointment. The whole family was with me and I was surprisingly excited for everything that goes on at the first doctors appointment especially the ultrasound. So Jeremy the kids and I went into the room where they do the ultrasounds and I lay down and and get my self ready. Dustin was a little scared with the lights off so Jeremy held him while Brooklyn sat in a chair and I said to him "Dustin do you want to see a baby?" At that moment I felt like something might not be right, and later on that day Jeremy told me he felt the same way. I think that was Heavenly father preparing us for a split second. So the technician was moving the wand all over my belly and I was like "How come we can't see anything." Then she turned off the machine and said well we got some sad news. She said that I have a blighted ovum which is where the baby never developed but everything else like the placenta and stuff did. The doctor later told us that when the fetus was trying to develop things were not matching correctly and my body knew that so it just discarded the fetus. I was pretty shocked because I have not had any bleeding at all these eleven weeks I've been pregnant. I cried a little in the ultrasound room and I little at home but I'm doing fine and I go in for a D and C on Monday. This has been a very humbling experience for me and also it was made me remember how blessed I am to have two beautiful children. I know Heavenly Father has a plan for each of us.